Sunday, July 27, 2008

Keys

Just having received keys to our new home a few hours earlier, all 6 of us were a little goofy and elated as we sat on the new carpet of our new home Friday night, envisioning daily life in our new surroundings, planning the move, thinking ahead to holiday dinners, and determining where the Christmas tree would go. We celebrated God's goodness and His blessings in providing this house. This is the end of a journey that began 5 years ago, and the beginning of another adventure.

Today marks another momentous occasion--our wedding anniversary. We have been married for 23 years. Just this last week my oldest daughter thanked my husband and I for staying married when so many of her friends' parents are divorced or separated. I told her the key to being married is having the Lord at the center of things which is not always an easy task, especially when our human nature wants to take the reigns and--most often--run in the opposite direction of where the Lord would have us go. It is so easy to become self-centered in marriage. Marriage is about becoming like Christ, and allowing the Lord to grow each of us and so we increasingly become more like Him, rather than ooshy-gooshy feelings. (The bonus is when you have ooshy-gooshy feelings too!)

I'm so thankful for my dear husband's commitment and faithfulness to me, for being a wonderful provider for our family, being a loving and involved father to our 4 kids, and for his desire to always be growing in the Lord. I'd say 'I do' all over again, but I'd definitely break out of the '80's style.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

Venting

I've just got to vent! What is the deal with customer service these days...or more accurately, non-customer service? I know this is not a new phenomenon, but lack of customer service at every turn in varying venues is a growing hot button for me. In my current employment, a good portion of my responsibility is customer service-related. I talk to numerous people everyday who feel they can't get any help from anyone--in this case insurance companies--or they don't have a voice that will be heard with the powers that be. More and more my position is turning into that of liaison and advocate for these people and more and more I see the need for it. And now, I find myself in my own customer service fiasco which just drives the point home even harder.

We are trying to close on our new house. We signed final purchase "docs" last week and are waiting for funds to be transferred from our bank (back east) to the title company so that things can be funded and we'll get the keys.

Here it is a week later and we're still waiting!!

This process started over 2 weeks ago! Our first request for our funds was "declined" because a signature from the builder was missing on one of the forms we submitted. After being told several days later that "a letter is in the mail to you", I quickly re-gathered all the forms, the supporting documents (double checking all signatures, etc.) and overnight-ed (faxes are not accepted) the required information. I called the next morning to verify receipt of everything and was told by the customer service guy, "Mike" that, according to the notes on the file, "everything looked good" and had been reviewed "by the committee".

Eager to know how soon the funds would be released, I called the following day to see how soon we could anticipate receipt of the funds. After an extremely long time on hold, the customer service gal #2 came back and said it appeared the request had once again been declined because a more recently dated closing document was needed from the seller. The most recent one was signed July 14, 2008.

WHAT?!?!

I asked her if I could please speak to a supervisor. Of course this took another 1/2 hour on hold. No, I'm not kidding. Thankfully it was a toll-free number I was calling. After a while a supervisor, Giselle, came on the phone and tried to explain the situation to me. None of which made sense. I asked her repeatedly if she could just review the documents we submitted and to look for herself, rather than going by the notes in the file. She looked over the documents and agreed that everything was in order--that we had in fact provided MORE than enough supporting documents and that clearly it seemed like everything should be fine.

After another extended period of time on hold with her, she came back to inform me that the "administrators" would have to look over the case again and get back to me, and that the only way she could resubmit the request was via email to that department and that "hopefully" she'd have some kind of response later in the day, "but certainly within 3 business days." She assured me that I could contact her if I had any questions or wanted to find out what was happening. When I asked for her direct number, of course she didn't have one. When I asked for her voice mail...of course she didn't have voice mail. So, when I did call her back because of an additional question I had, the 3rd customer service guy I talked to told me she wasn't reachable and then asked me again what the issue was and that he could put in a request, etc.... UGH!

Thankfully, Giselle, that I had talked to the most extensively called back by end of the day to let me know that the paperwork submitted had been approved and they would accept what they had in front of them. Yeah! Chalk one up for the customer. She said I could call back the following Monday (this last Monday) to check on the status and see how soon the funds would be sent. I asked if the funds could just be wired to the title company since there had been so many delays. I was promptly informed that 'they don't do that' and that a check would be sent directly to us for the amount. (The wheels of my mind were turning...'which means a hold by our bank, and then a subsequent hold by the title company...')

I checked in on Monday as planned. Of course, I couldn't reach Giselle, so talked to customer service person # 4. Was told by # 4 person that it is "in process", and could take another 2-3 business days. "Please feel free to call back tomorrow."

Tuesday AM I called again, this time, I talked with Mike from last week! He had good news and verified that "it was processed last night, but could take up to 2-3 business to days to finish being processed." HUH? "Feel free to call back tomorrow to see when you can expect the funds."

Which brings me to this morning.

I talked to yet another customer service gal who proceeded to go through a review of our entire file!! I gave her the reader's digest version to bring her up to speed and told her I was just checking back to see when the check would be going out. She proceeded to put me on hold to "double check" some items first. She came back and informed me the check would be going out today! Yeah!! (Again, the peon customer gets another boost!) I then informed her that I was told by Mike (yesterday) that I could get a tracking number since the check is being sent overnight via UPS to our house. Long silence on the other end of the phone.

"Mam, it isn't overnight delivery, it is expedited delivery." I assured her that we had been over this several times with the other myriad of customer service people and each verified that we had selected "overnight delivery" on our request form. I even double checked with Mike yesterday who said it would be via UPS and that a tracking number would be issued for OVERNIGHT delivery.

Again, this customer service gal takes "the tone" with me and says, "mam, we don't offer overnight delivery."

WHAT!! AM I BEING PUNKED??

I asked her to look over the copy of the request we signed, etc. She began reading to me in the most condescending voice one could possibly muster, "If you would like to expedite receipt and have your funds sent to you via overnight delivery, check this box." (The same selection I have confirmed each time with previous customer service people.) She proceeded to tell me that this statement doesn't mean overnight delivery--it means "expedited" delivery which could be 2-3 days for delivery. However, I was more than welcome to call back today before 4:30 Eastern time to get a tracking number, although they may not have one for me until tomorrow morning....

Okay, I'll confess, I'm beginning to lose it! Since when did "overnight delivery" not mean "overnight delivery?"

I immediately called the title company to let Mary, our account person, know the most recent information about the situation. She has been great in keeping everyone notified, updated on the process, etc. (A very great customer service person). Just now I received a phone call from our mortgage person, Laurie, who informed me that (of course) our interest rate lock runs out today. The good news is, we can get an extension until Friday with no charge if we KNOW FOR SURE that the funds will arrive tomorrow and we have a tracking number (see above) or, we will have to pay an additional $360 to lock in our rate for 7 more days. *** SEE UPDATE BELOW***

So, lucky me, I am going to make another phone call this afternoon to see if I can get a tracking number that may not be available until tomorrow morning, for a check that we requested "overnight"--but may not come overnight--so we can get our current interest rate that we're locked into through today, but may or may not be for the next week, for a house that we've already signed all the papers on that sits empty waiting for us, so we can move into it....who knows when.

Today I'm thinking that a long hot bubble bath in my new soaker tub sounds ideal. Of course, I have no idea when that will happen.

(Heavy sigh.)

*** I just had to give an update since I last posted. My husband and I decided to go ahead and lock in the interest rate for 7 more days and pay whatever we have to just to help alleviate some stress. When I talked to Laurie (mortgage gal) she said she had already done some phone calling on our behalf (there's more great customer service for you!) and the Builder is going to pay the $360 for us, understanding that the delay is not of our doing. I'll admit I burst into tears when I heard this. God is so mindful and I'm humbled once again as I'm reminded that He's aware of the details and is very much in the midst of the circumstances. Thank you, Lord for providing and blessing!

Friday, July 18, 2008

Inside Out

As I examine my face in the mirror I can see the toll that stress has taken on my skin. All those "tiny lines" I've had now seem like defined creases that won't diminish with repeated coverage of miracle skin cream. My skin has broken out in zits more in the last year than in previous years. Even my eyes seem to have lost their sparkle and seem dull to me. When I look in the mirror, I see someone that resembles me, but yet seems like a stranger.

Adding extra "stress" pounds doesn't help either. All of my hard work last year to shed almost 20 pounds has diminished as I have gained 15 back. UGH! I'm so mad that I have to repeat all that hard work. Yet somehow, in the midst of stress, the cravings for comfort food becomes overpowering. I'll admit I had reached a place in past months where eating good food was the only enjoyable, "fun" thing going on. Pretty sad state of affairs.

And yet, the stress continues. Slowly, yet for certain, I'm learning some important God-lessons from all of this. The two most prominent lessons are: God truly is able to sustain me and is faithful in the midst of extreme stress and uncertainty; and living in stress always requires faith and exercises my faith. My tendency is to want to find a way to cope with stress; figure out a way 'get through it' and make it palatable, even dull the pain or discomfort (such as in eating comfort food). My thinking is that if I grit my teeth long enough and plow through hard enough, then I'll get through it faster and "be done." If the situation can somehow become controllable or at the very least predictable, then it is easier to get through.

Being the type of person I am, I seem to always search for a "logical" reasoning to everything. No matter how difficult a situation is, if I can understand it--that is, if it is logical, reasonable, makes sense--then I feel I can have a better handle on the situation and get through it easier. When it is a situation totally out of my control and it doesn't seem to 'make sense', I can go a little bonkers. And, surprise, I have to exercise living by faith. Funny how that works. Funny that God knows that's how I work--and so he calls me to exercise faith more and more everyday. This is what He desires for me--what following Jesus is all about--living daily by faith. Not relying on what is predictable and controllable, but living life in a place where I am fully dependent only on the Lord for everything.

I was encouraged as I read a passage in scripture that speaks directly to living by faith and that this is evidence of the Lord actively working in me. I have known this...but to be reminded again, just when I needed it...was such a blessing (and again, a reminder that He KNOWS me!). It is easy in times of stress and uncertainty to throw oneself a pity party (I've had quite a few in recent months) , or wonder if God has taken a vacation, but if anything, it is the exact opposite. God is so up-close and personal. He is growing me, maturing me, building into me, not taking something away. It is the opposite of what I think is happening. As I see my outward self aging and showing signs of stress, my inward self is being built up and strengthened, renewed & regenerated, growing & being filled fuller with Him.

As I continue living by faith, looking to Him to be my comfort and His word to be my comfort food, I know that eventually the physical will follow--the pounds will come off, the blemishes will be less, and somehow I know the sparkle will return to my eyes.

Friday, July 11, 2008

Sweet 16

Happy Birthday
to our dear Miss H who is sweet 16 today!
She is such a joy and blessing to us.

Wednesday, July 02, 2008

“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.

For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”


Matthew 11:28-30


This passage has been swirling through my mind quite a lot lately. I've been ruminating on it--meditating on it--this week.

As I read fellow bloggers thoughts, or exchange emails with a dear friend recovering from a severe illness (love you K!), or hear of loved ones recently diagnosed with cancer, or other's whose family members have recently passed away, and stories of many others who are living through hardships due to unemployment, displaced homes, broken marriages, and so forth, I can't shake off the heaviness--the burden--that comes with living this life. Still feeling the weight of recent losses and on-going trials myself , I continue to feel the weight, even the tug-o-war that we as believers encounter daily; the desire to be obedient and follow the Lord wherever he leads, stepping out in faith, wanting to grow in deeper intimacy with Him, confident of his ability and his faithfulness, all the while, experiencing the cost that comes from following and surrendering. More often than not, this "cost" comes in the form of pain or discomfort, sorrow or grief, separation or uncertainty. (I know--I'm sounding a bit doom and gloom. Certainly there are times of joy and exuberance as well.)

"Weary" and "burdened" are two adjectives that I have used to describe the last many months of my life. So believe me, this passage of scripture has had my attention for quite awhile now. Having heard these verses growing up, I had wondered how something seemingly so heavy and cumbersome as a yoke could be light and easy? A bit "ox"-ymoronic I thought. I appreciate these words so much more since I heard a radio pastor describe an "easy yoke." (Perhaps this is old news to many, but I find it refreshingly hopeful...)

In true "ox" terms, there is such a thing as an "easy yoke". This is a special yoke, custom-made for each animal that will be wearing the yoke. The yoke is fitted perfectly to the oxen so that it won't rub or irritate the neck and shoulders of each animal. In fact, it is finely sanded and smoothed to eliminate any kind of friction that would cause the animal(s) to become impaired by sores or callouses that in effect would slow them down while doing their work, or worse yet, cause the animal(s) to become useless because of injury. (I wonder if Jesus made "easy yokes" when he was a carpenter? ) Secondly, as was the custom with an "easy yoke" , a weaker animal would always be paired with a stronger, more experienced one. This way, the stronger animal would take the lead and yet, being shoulder to shoulder with the weaker one, would help carry the load. The weaker one would learn from the stronger one and in effect become stronger as well, but it's burden would be lighter because of the ox it was linked to.

What a wonderful calming picture of what Jesus invites me (us) into. I love the imagery. He asks me to take on his yoke; one that is "easy", made to fit me perfectly. This isn't a one-size-fits-all deal! He is so personal and knows me so intimately that he knows just how to make the yoke fit so it won't cause additional pain or impairment. I love the picture too, of being linked shoulder to shoulder with Jesus, yet, He being the stronger of the pair, is always a few steps ahead leading the way; all I have to do is follow and learn from him, while having my load lightened because it is being carried by someone stronger and wiser than me.

I have been finding rest and comfort in this image--in the truth--of coming to Jesus, taking on his yoke, leaning into Him, learning from Him, and allowing Him to lead; the load feels lighter, and I am finding a refreshment in my spirit even in the midst of uncertain circumstances.