A New Day

Waking up this morning I felt a little surge of excitement run through my body. This is the day I've been waiting for--even anticipating. This is the day that marks a new stage of life I have informally dubbed "moving forward". That may not seem significant to most, but for me--for my family--it is momentous. This is the day that signifies we're done with memorial services for mothers/mothers-in-law/grandmothers; we are no longer in the 'making plans and preparations' phase; we no longer have to arrange our lives and schedules around death and dying, but rather can look forward.

This morning as the rest of the household--or rather, apartment-- is sleeping, I sit here sipping coffee, reflecting and remembering how good the Lord has been, how He has provided beyond measure and how He has sustained. On so many mornings in the previous months, a simple song would come to mind that I would will myself to sing, giving thanks and attempting to keep truth in front of me. Rarely did I feel thankful and like rejoicing, but in faith, would sing the words while driving to Mom's to take my shift in caring for her, or on the morning of her memorial service, or as we traveled to the coast to see my mother-in-law and say our good-byes, and as we attended her memorial service yesterday:

"This is the day that the Lord has made. I will be glad and rejoice in it. "

I relish this new sunny day, how wonderful to once again feel hopeful. While I know the grieving will be on-going as I work through the layers and do the hard work that I need to do, it is good--and encouraging--to be in this place; coming out of the valley, and out into the sunlight on this new day I've been given.