Perspective

When I received the phone call from the middle school today, I didn't mind--too much. On the other end of the phone was my youngest daughter informing me that she had to attend "Saturday School" due to logging in her 3rd tardy in one week, to her 6th period class. I could hear the gush of emotion and tears through the receiver. She was upset, perhaps even more so when she handed the phone over to her teacher who was very direct and matter-of-fact, letting me know why the 3 hours on Saturday were being imposed. I agreed and supported her decision.

As I hung up the phone I found myself smiling, even thankful. My youngest is the very social one of our kids. Her teachers have always liked her and she is known for being a leader and good student, however, her weakness is talking with friends. She is easily side tracked and has been known to lose track of time or events if there are friends around.

Even though "Saturday School" was not on the original agenda for this weekend, I don't mind as I reflect on the events of the last 24 hours. Two days ago I received a call from the church requesting two floral arrangements; 1 for a memorial service for an elderly gentleman who had passed away, and the other for the funeral for a newborn baby.

Creating funeral "pieces" is a challenging and often emotional experience. If I were wired differently, perhaps it could be possible to make the arrangements without thought and just manufacture something that would convey condolences and be a beautiful form of remembrance. But, I haven't found that un-emotional place yet. I can't help but think of the families and friends that have just lost their loved one, bound together by grief, undergoing a range of emotions and processes, and subsequently having to adjust to a new way of life that will go forward without the presence of the newly deceased.

Through the years, I have found it easier to make funeral arrangements when the deceased is elderly because they have lived a full, long life. Although still sad and a definite loss for the family, death is more expected and even anticipated to some extent.

Today, however, when I was making the funeral arrangement for the newborn baby, I couldn't hold back the tears. I thought of the young parents whose nursery is empty, the young mother who must now go through the same post-partum recovery process that other new moms go through, except that she won't have anything to show as her reward for the changes her body has made throughout the past many months. I couldn't help but think of the extended family members who were eager to meet this new little one, but instead find themselves attending a service, giving her back the Lord before they even were able to really know her.

As I delivered the flowers to the funeral home this morning, I continued to fight tears. Walking into the flower room at the rear of the building and placing my basket filled with pink and white blooms next to other arrangements that had been delivered for the service, I couldn't help but glance at each of them and see what others had created as a remembrance. All were very "pink" and delicate, soft and appropriate. I wondered if the other designers had struggled with their emotions as much as I had. Leaving the building and climbing back into my car, I couldn't hold back the tears any longer. I was overcome with grief for the loss of this little treasure from heaven and sorrow for the parents that are left alone with empty arms.

As I drove home and cried, I found myself thanking the Lord for the blessing of my 4 children, here, with us. Even though some of the tough times have been really tough, we still have the privilege of feeling their hugs, the sweetness of their kisses, the sound of the laughter. Why have we been so blessed? Why do some parents experience such pain and loss?

So today, when the middle school teacher called me informing me that my squirrel-ly 7th grader was needing some discipline, I was thankful; thankful that I get to experience the ups and downs of parenting; thankful for the joys and struggles of being a mom; thankful that my arms aren't empty.


*Please remember to pray for these young parents who are experiencing such a great loss.